Indian Catholic News

Parenting Skills in Just 31 Days

Tough parenting may be a tough call to take but it has, as shown in this book, the potential to create a win-win situation for both parents and children .

Reviewed By Ladislaus L D’Souza

Indulgent parenting seems to have taken deep root in several families, what with most parents blindly giving in to the wishes and desires of their children without bothering to say a firm no when it is absolutely needed. Any wonder then that parents are unable to instill in their children a strict sense of discipline? The need of the hour is benign but tough parenting. If we want our children to learn self-discipline, we ourselves must first and foremost be embodiments of integrity, unyielding in self-control.

Tough parenting may be a tough call to take but it has, as shown in this book, the potential to create a win-win situation for both parents and children. If children are constantly steered towards realizing their specific goals along lines drawn by the 31 simple skills highlighted in PARENTING SKILLS IN JUST 31 DAYS, their chances of making something sensible of their lives are bright and certain.

According to the author, “it is they (parents) who have somehow been the first cause and in some cases the only cause for the demon of indiscipline to sneak into their children. If they had been alert, they could have avoided that. If their lives had been pretty bouquets of pleasing qualities, their children would not have and could not have slipped into the gutter of indiscipline” (pp 7-8).

Perhaps there’s a germ of truth in what George Bernard Shaw says, “There may be some doubt as to who are the best people to have charge of children, but there can be no doubt that parents are the worst.” Sanjay Dev emphatically states, “Advocates of tough parenting, on the other hand believe that discipline and denial hold the key to success in later life” (p 10).

One of the factors responsible for the breakdown of discipline according to Devraj is the unwillingness on the part of today’s parents to make time for their children (pp 64-69). Busy as they are with mundane activities, their time is taken up with making more and more money. Being present to them by way of sparing quality time for them rather than giving them any amount of money they ask for is of prime importance.

Another lack in today’s generation is an attitude of gratitude. Devraj puts it metaphorically thus: “Appreciation and gratitude are like the sun and the sunflower, whereas jealousy and gratitude are like a gust of wind and a candle” (p 163).

There are likewise 29 other values the book dwells on, like willingness to apologize to one’s children when we are in the wrong (pp 88-93), and allowing children to learn from disappointments (pp 142-147) giving the reader food for thought for 31 consecutive days if one chooses to use it on a chapter-a-day basis. They are values that form steps to being successful in our God-given role of parenting on which depends the future of our children and the good of society.

Author : S.Devraj

Publisher: Better Yourself Books

Price INR :  130

Price US $: 10

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